I never understood what it was about ageing that bothered people so much. Wrinkles, fat, greying hair, that’s it right? I also never understood why it was so difficult for my sister (five years older to me) to go out there and make friends. Never thought it would be related.
I’m just 26 but here I am – no wrinkles, fat or greying hair, but my friends circle has started thinning out into space. It was a conscious decision to pull out the weeds, keep some at bay, and open up only to a select few. This segregation was done last year, and it helped me in ways I never imagined. I know truly who my friends are and I discovered that I love shopping alone, I can go for movies or have a meal by myself, so much that I’ll never want to share a dessert again! This clearing out has created a lot of empty space in my mind and how I spend my time. Sometimes it gets sorted by taking a book to the park, and otherwise, I wonder whom to call for that concert, since none of your ‘true’ friends share your interests.
I made a friend on chat a few months back. Let’s name her D to make this easier (You know who you are!). D and I went to the same college but we never once even waved at each other back then. We now stay in the same city, realised most of our friends are busy making families and we both enjoy similar music, movies, photography, baking and writing, apart from having so many common friends in our home town!
This led to catching up for coffee twice and we chat almost daily. It sometimes feels like we are each other’s’ counsellors. We’ve talked about our past, little things we enjoy during the day, shared links and sometimes, even what we ate. But that’s where it ends. We don’t text or call, but I’ve dropped her home and visited her place once. With single girls who stay by themselves, sleep overs are inevitable. So, D recently suggested that we have a sleep over, since we have both been feeling low lately. But with a person with whom you’ve developed a friendship primarily over the Internet, do you ever wonder – how soon is too soon?
This isn’t some kind of a nagging worry, but it feels like a date. I tend to wonder if we’ll get along offline at a place so personal, like home. Or if we should just meet out, like earlier. What if we don’t enjoy each other’s company at home? We realise you can’t back out, followed by that awkward feeling that we’re not meant to be friends. That awkward feeling will follow you while sitting next to each other when you’re watching a movie, having dinner, sleeping on the same bed, and even through breakfast the next morning. In any case, I decided to call D home just to have some fun and stay away from the moody blues for a while.
